Hello, Again

I had a random chat with my senior from Canada.

And to point it out, she said she used to read my blog. Quite a surprise.

And then, I don't know, I just had this feeling to read back all my posts since the day that I started out this blog. A sunken feeling that I want to say "Hello" again to myself, to know what kind of a person I used to be back then. What kind of things that I wrote about, what do I feel during that time.

I found myself again.

It's not like I'm surrounded by walls or barbed-wire fences. I lead a good life, I might have to say. Not nearly as good but good enough. And to look through those emotional, pathetic, somewhat good (eh, puji diri sendiri), and mediocre posts again, I realize my own weaknesses.

Melancholy, I yearn for love. Of past, I dwell in them. Of future, I'm afraid. Of present, I struggle. Sometimes, I rise like the morning sun. Other times, I fall like autumn leaves. But that doesn't make me feel small, as I gallantly walk through those days.

I did a little time travel.

On this worldly line, I used to have passion. Greet by warring winds, I do carry prayers and ambitions. And I am the witness of myself.

I listen to myself again.

He talks to me about beauty.